by Kelly Lyons L.Ac., MSOM
I hear often, in session, that vibrant women feel down about their age, due to their doctors and the internet telling them that they are approaching an “advanced maternal age.”
At a time in society when women are dialoguing more strongly about gender respect, I feel that it is an important topic to discuss in fertility circles.
A benefit of living in a globalizing economy the last 20+ years, is that we have learned a few different cultural perspectives. There are as many ways to view aging as there are people aging.
There is hard truth to the advanced maternal age story. Yes, the older we get, the less eggs we have, and the more degraded the quality might be. That said, there is a timeless quality to who we are as women. It is our responsibility to nurture that non-physical aspect of ourselves and let it be vital and well.
I don’t think harsh ageism is entirely personal. So try to hear it at face value—someone on your team is telling you what THEY know, statistically. As a patient, you need to take ownership of what YOU know about you. You can cultivate your own perspective on aging, and contribute that perspective to the work you are doing with your fertility team.
I encourage you to blow up the box, and enjoy your thirties and your forties, as a whole person. Wrangling your reproductive life is a part of that wholeness. We all know that something stronger than our physical bodies is driving the desire and the dreams we chase.
It’s important to keep this “aging thing” in perspective.